Week 11-Taking a Moment to Appreciate my Traveling Partner

When I think about this bicycling adventure across the United States, I feel as though I have been on three different epic quests: a quest to see and understand the world better, an internal quest to see what I am made of, and a parenting quest.

The first quest has been the most enjoyable; experiencing the deserts, the small towns, the magnificent rivers, the wildlife and the people, all strikingly different and strikingly the same.

I have learned how the land across North America is shaped and how this land holds different ecosystems that all encompass their own worlds, pressing up against each other and mixing together along the edges. There are little connections between them of migrating animals and flowing waterways, but for the most part they are separate and distinct and change from one hour to the next as we pedal through. There is a startlingly amount of variety in life and landscape in this country.

I have also been lucky enough to interact with all manner of people within this diverse landscape and have been able to see how people seem to mimic the land around them; the leathery, tough desert dwellers, the quiet, hidden people living in the hollows between shady hills, and the expansive warmth of those in the prairies.

I have found that most everyone is kind if given the opportunity, no matter what their ideologies or lifestyles. When we have needed help it has always been there. We have had lunch paid for by strangers, rides to bike shops when our bikes have broken down, ice cold bottles of water and snacks handed to us as we cycle by, offers of lodging, money given to us and countless cheers, thumbs up and friendly honks. It has been incredible to experience this support and generosity, both at home from friends and from perfect strangers. It really, truly does fuel us.

The second quest I have been experiencing is a personal quest. This trip has been incredibly demanding physically and at times emotionally. The hills have been huge, the winds fierce, the dogs scary, and feeling as though I don’t know what the next day may hold has been exhausting. I have had to push myself farther than I ever have. I have had to fling myself into the unknown over and over. I know a lot of people have successfully completed a bike tour across America with panache, but for me it has been deeply challenging. I have also been homesick and longed for my husband, my other children, my dog and the safety and security of my own bed. I am interested to see how it shapes me. I can’t tell you now because the challenges are still coming.

The third quest has been a motherhood quest. Spending 12 weeks with my 16-year-old son in such an intense way has been a psychological trip unto itself. I am often quick to brag about his physical gifts and at the same time disparage his behavior, but today I can wholeheartedly say that I think he is amazing. What he is accomplishing is nothing short of incredible.

For 70 days he has woken up beside his mother (hard enough in itself), packed up our tent on his own, and then hit the road for 6 to 8 hours of cycling, averaging 60 miles a day and carrying more weight than his dear old ma. He has climbed all the hills, eaten all the nasty food, traversed all the windy deserts, slept on all the concrete and sodden ground, all without bailing out on me or outright refusing to go further. He has told me endless stories (specifically, every single superhero movie in detail) to entertain us both. He has encouraged me when I despaired after losing our way again and again, once even taking us 20 miles out of our way. Most people would have brained me!

Sometimes, he loses his good humor and lapses into blaming me for all wrongs, but it is always short lived, and he always comes around quickly. He even apologizes. On top of all this he has been doing schoolwork, math, writing, and reading, and he has ended every single day by putting up our tent. That is a tremendous gift, trust me.

It is a great challenge to spend this much time with any one person, and he does drive me crazy. I know that I drive him crazy, too, but in this moment of clarity, I just can’t believe that he is doing this. That we are doing this. That we seem to have found a way.

A little less than two weeks left, if all goes well. Some big mountains, big dogs, and hopefully a big finish.

Oakley’s Perspective Week: 11

This week has a list of the three craziest things that have happened on the whole trip.

Number one: First the dog update. The dogs here in Kentucky can be really scary, but if you stop your bike when they start chasing they realize that you’re a human and not a deer or something exciting to chase. We have had a few scary moments where dogs have been pretty threatening to us, but we have never been bitten or had to spray a dog with our bear spray. Today we were going through a very quiet little town when a little party of dogs showed and followed us to the edge of town like dog parade. They were barking their heads off the whole time. We have also noticed that some dogs seem neglected and abused. People put their dogs in tight. stinky kennels and leave them there or on chains all day.

Number two: A couple days ago we took a day off in Berea, Kentucky. We camped out behind a fire station and the next morning we went to a lovely café in the morning and spent the rest of the day at the library and walking around. Berea has a lovely college where it was free for students, but they have to work for their tuition by making crafts and selling them. The money does not go to students, it goes to the school because they’re paying off their tuition. Berea College is a super wealthy school, they say it’s like Harvard.

Anyway, on the morning of our departure from Berea, we heard that there was a murder and kidnapping suspect at large in the next county that we happened to be biking through. They closed all the schools. My mom did not know what to, but we figured that the man would be hiding, not wondering around seeking bikers to kill, so we went for it. It was stressful.

Number three: On the same day we were worrying about the murder suspect, we were biking down the road and I passed a trashcan that had meows coming from it. I quickly turned backed and got off my bike to look into the trashcan. Looking up at me were too stupid-cute kittens trapped in a deep metal trash can. I could not believe my eyes. The two kittens looked at me with their beautiful blue eyes and meowed. I scooped them up and showed them to my mom. We couldn’t figure out whether the people were trying to get rid of them or they just got stuck in the trashcan. It was so heartbreaking to leave the babies behind but there was nothing else we could do.